Seriously? OMG! WTF? » Stupid Sequels/Remakes
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Who asked for a White Men Can Jump remake?
January 17th, 2017 under Stupid Sequels/Remakes, Woody Harrelson. [ Comments: none ]

Can you believe White Men Can Jump is celebrating its 25th anniversary this year? Not only that, according to The Hollywood Reporter Black-ish’s creator Kenya Barris and sports stars’ NBA’s Blake Griffin and NFL’s Ryan Kalil are remaking it.
Who asked for that? The movie was OK in 1992, but it doesn’t hold up well. The only reason we are still talking about it because of its two stars Woody Harrelson and Wesley Snipes.
Seriously, do you think this movie needs to be remade?


This is not TV’s CHiPs
January 12th, 2017 under Stupid Sequels/Remakes. [ Comments: none ]

The first trailer for the big screen version of CHiPs is out and it looks like the bombs that keep going off during it. Seriously, it looks so bad, even the Razzies wouldn’t nominate it. I just can’t say anything nice about it. Except maybe the real California Highway Patrol will pull over the truck that is carrying all the copies of the film and destroy it.
Where is Erik Estrada when you need him?


Can we sink the Splash remake?
August 1st, 2016 under Channing Tatum, Stupid Sequels/Remakes. [ Comments: none ]

That high pitched scream you heard was not from Daryl Hannah saying her real name in Splash, but me when I just read in The Hollywood Reporter that they are remaking the 1984 movie with Channing Tatum as the Mermaid.
Splash is a movie that holds up very well, so there is no reason to remake it. Let alone to remake with Channing Tatum in Hannah’s role and Jillian Bell in Tom Hanks’s part. No.
Who wants to see a movie with a male Mermaid? Not being sexist, but they are women. At least half women, but you know what I mean.
Tatum needs to stick with what he does best, dancing half naked in movies like Step Up and Magic Mike. Not playing a half naked Merman.
Dear Hollywood and Disney, Stop remaking great movies and turning them into crappy ones. Didn’t this summer’s box office teach you anything? Guess not.


What blockhead thinks that a Tetris movie is a good idea?
May 18th, 2016 under Stupid Sequels/Remakes. [ Comments: none ]

Remember when you were a kid and you loved playing Tetris? Did you ever think that would make a great movie? No, you didn’t. No one did. Well not no one because someone thinks it is a $80 million epic sci-fi thriller according to The Hollywood Reporter.
To me it seems like a Horror movie in the vein of Saw. In order to survive you, you need to complete the puzzle. Anything else, it just seems like a waste of $80 let alone $80 million.
The only requirement I have the blockbuster is that they keep the theme song.


Disney took all the fun out of Pete’s Dragon
February 22nd, 2016 under Stupid Sequels/Remakes. [ Comments: none ]

When I was a little kid, Pete’s Dragon was one my favorite movies. I drove my parents crazy watching it over and over and over again.
Now, nearly 40 years later, Disney has decided to remake the classic movie. Only problem is that they turned the sweet lovable musical into a Jurassic Park wannabe. WTF?
How can they destroy a family favorite like that? I thought CGI was going to ruin it, but it looks the J.J. Abrams era of filmmaking might have done it in. Doesn’t the trailer feel like Cloverfield or Super 8?
The only thing that makes me stop crying after watching this teaser trailer is re-watching Pete’s Song from the original Pete’s Dragon.


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