Seriously? OMG! WTF? » Ashton Kutcher
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Ashton Kutcher touched a cow and it 💩
September 10th, 2019 under Ashton Kutcher, Jimmy Fallon. [ Comments: none ]


Ashton Kutcher was on The Tonight Show yesterday and Jimmy Fallon decided to milk his appearance on the show. As in the NBC host challenged him to a Cow Milking Contest.

The two men sat down with their cows and Kutcher rubbed his for good luck. Well, the mama started to move. There was a huge reason why. She took a big old 💩. I guess you can say he has the reverse of the Midas Touch.

In fact, it continued on because he lost to the gagging Fallon who could not take the 💩 stench.

That is why working with big animals on talk shows is always the best. They either pee or poop. While that is great for us. There is always that poor underpaid person who has to clean it up.

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Ashton Kutcher explains his pornstache
September 9th, 2019 under Ashton Kutcher, Jimmy Fallon. [ Comments: none ]


For the last few months we have seen Ashton Kutcher with a mustache and it is not for a role. Then why would he do that to his model face? Revenge!

Who is he getting revenge on? He told Jimmy Fallon on tonight’s Tonight Show that it is wife. He went to a birthday party of an English singer and she told him it was a ’70s themed one. Therefore, he went as the late Burt Reynolds from Boogie Nights. He thought he was looking fly.

There was just one problem, Mila Kunis got the decade wrong, It was a ’30s New Year’s Eve party. Which means he was totally out of place but didn’t show it. He just acted like everything was groovy.

That was the party. When he got home, he got revenge on his wife by deciding not to shave off the pornstache he grew for the party. You have to wonder who is suffering more because of it? Jackie who has to look at it even though she likes it or Kelso that has to go around in public looking like that even though he hates it? To me, he is the loser of the two because only select people look good in a stache and he is not one of them.

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Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis react their marriage being over
June 20th, 2019 under Ashton Kutcher, That '70s Show. [ Comments: none ]


Every week, it is reported that Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis are either breaking up or they are having twins. This week, In Touch said that they are splitting up because he has a dark secret and she is taking the kids.

Well, they are as shocked as we are that Kelso and Jackie couldn’t make their three-year marriage work. So much so, they recorded a video to show us how shocked they are. Now we are left to wonder, are they having twins to join daughter Wyatt, 4, and son Dmitri, 2. Congrats on the babies!

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Ashton Kutcher asked Brad Pitt if he could date Jennifer Aniston
January 23rd, 2019 under Ashton Kutcher, Brad Pitt. [ Comments: none ]


Back when Ashton Kutcher was 17, he made a $1,000 bet with his friends that he would go on a date with Friends’ Jennifer Aniston. Several years later he met her, and he told Graham Norton that he asked Brad Pitt, who was her husband at the time, if he could ask her out. Her then-husband was like go for it. Therefore, he went up to his crush and asked her out for some pizza. Was she so flattered that she said yes? Hell no. She rejected him on the spot.

It’s OK, he has done better. A lot better. And now he and Aniston are friends and have had several friendly dates. No word, if he paid his friend the $1,000. Which I am not sure if he should or shouldn’t.

Anyways, how freaking awesome is that story? Imagine asking a stranger if you can date his wife and that guy saying go ahead? It does not happen. What happens is that guy punches the suitor right in the kisser.

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Ashton Kutcher is losing his hair
June 5th, 2018 under Ashton Kutcher. [ Comments: none ]


We think of Ashton Kutcher as a manly guy and turns out he is full of extra testosterone. According to what he told Conan O’Brien that is causing the hunky actor to go bald prematurely. That is right, his hairline is receding.

What is he going to do about it? Is he going to do a Donald Trump combover, a hair again/off again like John Travolta or just go completely bald like The Rock? None of the above. He is going to do a Ron Howard and wear a baseball cap when it happens.

But that does not mean he is letting it go gracefully. Up until he and Mila Kunis decided to have kids about three years ago, he was trying to keep his hair in his head with Finasteride. He did not know how that medicine would affect his little boys, so he went off the meds. And off went some of his brown locks. I wonder if he looked in the mirror and said, “Dude, where’s my hair?”

Anyways, I think he will still be the guy we fell in love with in the ’70s with or without hair. What do you think?

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