Seriously? OMG! WTF?

SCARY Spice, Mel B has hired a top Hollywood lawyer to fight comic Eddie Murphy in the courts. The 31-year-old has called in legal veteran Don Engel to take on the funnyman, who has denied he is the father of her unborn child. Engel, who charges $500 an hour, has represented heavyweight artists including Cher, Meatloaf and Fleetwood Mac. He has an unrivalled reputation as one of Hollywood’s biggest legal hitters and is renowned in the music biz. Mel has vowed to get every penny she can from the 45-year-old actor who she began dating six months ago. She was dumped after he claimed in an interview on Dutch TV that they were no longer an item. And the Beverly Hills Cop star has even demanded a DNA test to prove whether he was the father or not. A pal of the former Spice Girl said: "Mel is refusing to lie down and let Eddie walk all over her – and this is reflected in her choice of lawyer. "She wants to hit him where it hurts… in the pocket and they don’t come much better than Don." Sources suggest that Mel may be able to get as much as £15million in lifelong payments for their unborn child. Yorkshire-born Mel – real name Melanie Brown – interviewed a raft of Hollywood lawyers before she plumped for Don’s services. A law insider said: "Don’s services don’t come cheap but he is one of the best lawyers around. "Most lawyers would relish taking on an A-list star and Don will surely be no exception." Murphy, who is already dating film producer Tracey Edmonds, 39, will be no pushover though. He has millions to throw at an equally heavyweight lawyer and will fight Mel B’s claim all the way. But a pal close to Mel said: "She is just as feisty and is determined to win. "A reconciliation is probably out the question after he humiliated her in such a way on television. "She has been devastated by what has happened – especially since they had talked about marriage. "This is war – and if Eddie doesn’t know it, he will very shortly." You go, girl…

3am Girls 

You know at this point she is just doing it to humilate him which I guess she does owe him one for what he did to her…but if she did cheat on him then…well maybe they are even. I just don’t know anymore.

TVGuide.com has learned that General Hospital pink-slipped Stuart Damon this week. The Daytime Emmy winner has played Dr. Alan Quartermaine on the ABC sudser since 1977. Word is, Dr. Q will suffer a fatal heart attack in February sweeps. This is very sad news, suds fans, but it’s no surprise. Recently, Alan has been little more than a glorified extra in those quarrelsome Quartermaine livingroom scenes. And in these days of budgetary belt-tightening in afternoon TV, the veteran soap pros seem to be first to go. A GH rep had no comment for this story.

TV Guide 

I wish they would use the Quatermaines more and The Corinthos less, but I do not see that happening anytime soon.

CBS is giving new Adam Sandler-produced laffer "Rules of Engagement" the best comedy timeslot on TV while finalizing plans to say goodbye to "The King of Queens" after nine seasons. Starting Feb. 5, "Rules" will run Mondays at 9:30 p.m. behind the top-rated "Two and a Half Men," the Eye will announce today. Its premiere will come one day after CBS airs Super Bowl XLI, allowing the net to give the David Spade-Patrick Warburton laffer a major promo push during the big game. CBS Paramount and Sony Pictures TV produce "Rules" in association with Sandler’s Happy Madison shingle. Tom Hertz, Jack Giarraputo and Doug Robinson are exec producers. Move will mean a timeslot switch for "The New Adventures of Old Christine," which has occupied the plum slot after "Men" since its premiere last spring. After a brief hiatus during February, "Old Christine" will shift to Mondays at 8:30 p.m. on March 12. "The Class," which currently airs in the 8:30 p.m. slot, will wrap its first season on March 5. Eye’s strategy is designed to virtually eliminate comedy repeats in the 8:30 and 9:30 p.m. Monday timeslots. Net also wants to give all of its comedy players a fair shake on Mondays before it makes up its mind about how to schedule the night next season. Sked shuffle marks a major vote of confidence in "Rules." Eye execs are no doubt hoping the male-skewing "Rules," which features a heavy dose of ribald humor, will be a better fit with "Men" than the more femme-friendly "Old Christine." While "Christine" has been a solid performer on Mondays and has even landed on some critics’ year-end top 10 lists, skein still loses about 20% of its lead-in. Not helping matters: "Christine" has had to face off against the red-hot "Heroes" for most of the fall. As for "Rules," CBS plans to air seven episodes of the laffer on Mondays. On April 9, net will bring back "King of Queens" — which goes on hiatus after its Jan. 3 broadcast — in the 9:30 p.m. Monday slot. CBS will have seven episodes of "Queens" in the can, which means the skein’s series finale will likely air on May 21. Net hasn’t locked in any dates for the finale, however.

Variety 

Dang you CBS, I love The Class. Translation with a March season finale…the show will not be back next season…but thank g-d neither will King of Queens!!! Why is that show still on the air? Seriously who watches that show? And on that note who watches Old Christine?

Emily Mortimer has replaced injured actress Samantha Morton in the cast of "Transsiberian," a thriller starring Woody Harrelson and Ben Kingsley, the film’s Spanish producer said Wednesday. Morton was forced to drop out after being hurt when a ceiling fell at her London home, according to Filmax Entertainment. "Transsiberian," which began production last week in Vilnius, Lithuania, will shoot on location in Beijing and Russia. Brad Anderson ("The Machinist") directs. Harrelson and Mortimer play a couple who travel on the famed Trans-Siberian train from China to Moscow. They soon encounter another couple, played by Kate Mara and Eduardo Noriega, and what seems to be a simple train journey turns into a chase full of deception and murder. Kingsley plays a Russian police officer hot on the couples’ trail. Mortimer’s recent credits include "The Pink Panther" and "Match Point."

Reuters 

Sounds like Samantha Morton had a real life thriller in her life if she was injured wher her ceiling fell on her.

Duran Duran is eyeing a May release for its second Epic album since its original quintet reunited in 2001. But, as previously reported, the set will feature minimal contributions from guitarist Andy Taylor, who left the band in October to pursue other projects. It will, however, include three tracks produced by Timbaland, one of which, "Night Runner," features Justin Timberlake. "I’m always personally really inspired by working with urban producers, moreso than rock producers," keyboardist Nick Rhodes tells Billboard.com. "They really bring something to the songs that we don’t have completely covered, whereas with rock producers, often I find [they suggest] things we’d do ourselves naturally anyway." The Timberlake collaboration is one Duran Duran has been trying to engineer for quite some time and finally materialized in September in New York. "All of us have admired his work, particularly on his first solo album," Rhodes says of Timberlake. "He’s a real talent. It was quite natural for him and [Duran Duran frontman] Simon [LeBon] to be working together on vocal arrangements and melodic structure." The as-yet-untitled follow-up to 2004’s "Astronaut" will also feature the reggae-tinged "48 Hours Later" and "Transcendental Mental," which Rhodes says takes aim at "new-age frauds. It’s one of the funniest lyrics Simon has written in many years." The other Timbaland-produced tracks are "Skin Divers" and "Zooming In." Asked if the disparate sounds of those cuts compared to the album’s more guitar-driven songs may be jarring to the listener, Rhodes says, "With [the Timbaland tracks], you can tell there was another hand in them for sure. Although they are a slight change of direction in that some of the others are a bit more guitar-heavy or indie-sounding, Simon is the glue that holds them all together." Rhodes adds that he doesn’t think the album "will suffer" for the dearth of Taylor’s contributions. "With Duran Duran, we’ve always accepted change. Music evolves, or sound has evolved and this is a new phase we’re moving into now, and I couldn’t be more excited about it," he says. "I truly wish him well. You never say never with these things. We may end up playing with Andy another day in the future. For now, we’d done another five years together and I guess that seems to be our attention span. It was five years the first time and five years this time." The group will launch a summer tour in conjunction with the album. "I always think it’s much more fun when you can go out with material that isn’t more than a year old," Rhodes says. "Last time, we were playing material, as new material, that to us was already three years old."

Billboard (story) and Duran Duran’s MySpace (photo)

I love Duran Duran and I am excited that they are putting out a new album, but I am nervous because I don’t get the whole Timberland/Timberlake thing.  

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