Jean-Claude Van Damme tested and approved celio jeans by doing one of his infamous splits. However, he did not do it on the ground or in space. Instead, he did it with one leg on the floor and the other one touching the ceiling.
Because of that, I cannot believe that he is 64. Men a third his age could not do it. I tried to do it, and my doctor told me I am an idiot and deserved the sprain. She is not wrong, but it still hurts. Not as much as falling during my failed attempt. Who knew Van Damme was a verb? But I made it one as I hit the floor.
Today is going to be a shitty day in the United States. Therefore, we need something good. And we are getting that because of Jean-Claude Van Damme.
The martial arts actor shared a video of himself shaking his tail feather just like he did in the 1989 movie Kickboxer. Watching him dance, it is hard to believe it has been 35 years since that movie came out.
I don’t know about you, but this is just what I needed today.
https://www.instagram.com/p/B62Ys41ljj2/?igshid=14rc6db4f81qi
We are all hungover from the holidays and we need something to make us feel better. How about Jean-Claude Van Damme dancing with his puppy? I don’t know about you, but my headache and upset stomach are all gone now. I am ready to face work again on Monday. What about you?
His dancing is pure joy and he needs to do it more often! Someone needs to give him a dancing movie. Martial arts is so yesterday.
Jean-Claude Van Damme was on Conan yesterday, and O’Brien’s staff told the martial arts actor something about their boss before he went on the air. They revealed to him that O’Brien has a mental issue about his lack of a butt.
Before they started the interview, Van Damme brought that little tidbit up and said that Conan has a nice bum. That is when the TBS host stood up and let his guest feel his assets. Which he did, but Conan stayed a little too long.
Then when the show and feel was done, Van Damme gave us all tips on how to strengthen our tushes. Lie down on the ground, contract your butt cheeks for three seconds, release for two and repeat 30 times. If you do it properly, then you will not be able to walk the next day. Who cares about that because no one who is walking behind you will be able to look up at the back of your head. If you catch my drift and not my fart.
I can say that because you stopped reading after I told you the secret to having nice buttocks.
Jean-Claude Van Damme is as known for his splits as his Martial Arts, but it still makes me wonder how he does the former. I mean, he is a man, doesn’t it hurt when he gets down on the floor with legs wide open like that? It hurts me and I am a woman, so it makes me think how does he get through the pain? Is there any? This is what happens when I get lost my thoughts?
