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Miller Lite finds a bright side to 2020
November 24th, 2020 under Ads. [ Comments: none ]

Do you hate going to your work holiday parties? Well, this year they are off? Now, you don’t have to celebrate with the people you hate. Instead, you can grab a Miller Lite, and enjoy the beer with the people you actutally like. That is when it is safe again. Like 2022!


Santa knows that Samuel L. Jackson being off the naughty words is Pulp Fiction
November 11th, 2020 under Ads, John Travolta, Samuel L Jackson. [ Comments: none ]

Samuel L. Jackson and John Travolta reunited for a Capital One commercial, and Christmas came early this year for us. I have no idea what was going on, but it brought a smile to my face that I can’t turn upside down. It is the joy that 2020 has been longing for, and we finally got it.

Now, we need someone to give them a holiday movie because Travolta is a natural Santa Claus. It can be an odd couple film like Santa and Krampus, or in Jackson’s case Crapmus. Just one requirement, Quentin Tarantino can’t direct it. It needs to be a comedy and not a bloodfest.


How did it take 32 years for DieHard to come up with this ad?
October 19th, 2020 under Ads, Bruce Willis. [ Comments: none ]

In 1988, Bruce Willis starred in a little Christmas movie called Die Hard. Now, 32 years later, DieHard battery is finally did an epic ad combining the two? What took you so long, mother f*ckers? Oh yeah, great things come to those who wait. Either that, or it took them this long to save up the money to make this commercial. How much do you think it cost? I am sure it cost them more than a Yippee Ki Yay.


Good Humor teams up with RZA for a new ice cream truck jingle
August 14th, 2020 under Ads. [ Comments: none ]
Did you know the ice cream truck jingle we know has racist ties to it? It does because of parody versions of the 19th-century tune. Good Humor no longer wants ice cream to be associated with that song anymore.

Therefore, they reached out to Wu Tang Clan’s RZA, and asked him to come up with a new track for them and all ice cream trucks. How could he say no to that? Especially since they offered him a lifetime supply of their ice cream for free. They didn’t. But it would sweeten, literally, the deal for me.

Anyways, Good Humor and RZA are making their version free forever to all of the ice cream trucks in the world. All they ask is that they stop playing Turkey in the Straw, and use their modern melody instead.

I prefer it to the original. What about you?

BTW Am I the only one who wants to know why they went to RZA instead of Ice-T, Ice Cube, or Vanilla Ice? Not that I don’t like what he did. It just seems like one of the Ices go better with ice cream.

To hear RZA’s Good Humor jingle, then click here!


If Jason Voorhees can wear a mask, so can you
June 30th, 2020 under Ads, Coronavirus. [ Comments: 3 ]

Back in 1989, Jason Voorhees took Manhattan, and then Manhattan took him after he took a lot of people. No matter how many times people tried and successfully killed him, he always wore his mask.

Therefore, it makes sense that New York would ask him to be their face…covered by a mask to prevent the spread of coronavirus, to get people to wear one.

While Jason can get killed and come back to life, people cannot. You don’t want to be a Jason and kill people because you didn’t wear a mask, so wear one.

Let’s stop the spread of COVID-19 and wear a mask! They are fashionable. They have different designs now. You don’t have to brush your teeth. Men don’t have to shave, and women don’t have to wear a mask. What is the downside?

I don’t know why people say wearing a mask will kill you. Jason Voorhees, Michael Myers, Leatherface, and Ghostface all wear masks, and they never die. No matter how many times they get killed. And they have been killed a lot of times in a lot of different ways!

On a side note, I wish they would have used a different voice actor. They should have gone with Jon Bon Jovi because he’s from New Jersey too. That and I always pictured Jay, Jay, Jay, Jay, son, son, son, son with a raspy voice like Bon Jovi’s.


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