Seriously? OMG! WTF?

“It’s a great day for America everybody. But it is in fact a sad day for American television. An American comedy legend is calling it quits. He made us laugh for years, we’ve followed him through his ups & downs. But he’s made a decision to leave the pinnacle of American broadcasting. That’s right, David Hasselhoff has quit “America ’s Got Talent.”…
“Of course the really big news in TV is Conan O’Brien. Said today in a written statement that he will not do the Tonight Show after Jay Leno. Which means he quit. I think. He also said he wants to make the Tonight Show the best it can be. Which means he didn’t quit. I think. I have got no idea. I’m sure the lawyers will figure it out. Because that’s the best way for two parties that can’t agree on anything to work something out. Get some lawyers in there and get it all worked out. It worked on my first two marriages. Worked for the lawyers, anyway.”
“Actually, I can think of a much better solution to the lawyers. Here is what I think we should do here. Government bailout money. It worked with Wall Street. Why doesn’t Congress give NBC money to make MORE late night TV shows?”…
“We have to take a break. I am frightened to take a break cause I don’t know if my job will be here when I get back. I suppose I better then. Look if I take a break and you come back and it is Jay Leno, you know what happened.”

UPDATE: Here is Conan O’Brien on The Tonight Show (for as long as he will be hosting it) getting some help from the new judge of America’s Got Talent Howie Madel!

David Letterman also talked about the late night changes on his show and he said that NBC called him and told him they don’t want him back.

And the late night hosts aren’t the only ones talking about, departing talk show host Bonnie Hunt can be seen joking about on her show tomorrow on NBC.

Here is Jay Leno talking about the changes tonight on his show at 10p (for the next few weeks) and what other NBC show he might wind up doing!

UPDATE 2: On ABC’s Jimmy Kimmel Live! at 12:05a, he dressed up as Jay Leno and cracked the below jokes.

“Hello, my name is Jay Leno. And let it hereby be known – that I’m taking over all the shows in late night. Beginning with this! It’s great to be here on ABC.”
“You know what ABC stands for? Always Bump Conan.”
“Conan O’Brien today announced that he is leaving NBC. He released a statement today that said, “I won’t participate in the destruction of the Tonight Show.” Fortunately though – I will!”
“For those of you who tuned in to see Jimmy Kimmel tonight – he’s gone – Jimmy is not here anymore. But don’t worry, Jimmy will be fine. I hear he picked up an endorsement deal with Jenny Craig.”

People of Earth:

In the last few days, I’ve been getting a lot of sympathy calls, and I want to start by making it clear that no one should waste a second feeling sorry for me. For 17 years, I’ve been getting paid to do what I love most and, in a world with real problems, I’ve been absurdly lucky. That said, I’ve been suddenly put in a very public predicament and my bosses are demanding an immediate decision.

Six years ago, I signed a contract with NBC to take over The Tonight Show in June of 2009. Like a lot of us, I grew up watching Johnny Carson every night and the chance to one day sit in that chair has meant everything to me. I worked long and hard to get that opportunity, passed up far more lucrative offers, and since 2004 I have spent literally hundreds of hours thinking of ways to extend the franchise long into the future. It was my mistaken belief that, like my predecessor, I would have the benefit of some time and, just as important, some degree of ratings support from the prime-time schedule. Building a lasting audience at 11:30 is impossible without both.

But sadly, we were never given that chance. After only seven months, with my Tonight Show in its infancy, NBC has decided to react to their terrible difficulties in prime-time by making a change in their long-established late night schedule.

Last Thursday, NBC executives told me they intended to move the Tonight Show to 12:05 to accommodate the Jay Leno Show at 11:35. For 60 years the Tonight Show has aired immediately following the late local news. I sincerely believe that delaying the Tonight Show into the next day to accommodate another comedy program will seriously damage what I consider to be the greatest franchise in the history of broadcasting. The Tonight Show at 12:05 simply isn’t the Tonight Show. Also, if I accept this move I will be knocking the Late Night show, which I inherited from David Letterman and passed on to Jimmy Fallon, out of its long-held time slot. That would hurt the other NBC franchise that I love, and it would be unfair to Jimmy.

So it has come to this: I cannot express in words how much I enjoy hosting this program and what an enormous personal disappointment it is for me to consider losing it. My staff and I have worked unbelievably hard and we are very proud of our contribution to the legacy of The Tonight Show. But I cannot participate in what I honestly believe is its destruction. Some people will make the argument that with DVRs and the Internet a time slot doesn’t matter. But with the Tonight Show, I believe nothing could matter more.

There has been speculation about my going to another network but, to set the record straight, I currently have no other offer and honestly have no idea what happens next. My hope is that NBC and I can resolve this quickly so that my staff, crew, and I can do a show we can be proud of, for a company that values our work.

Have a great day and, for the record, I am truly sorry about my hair; it’s always been that way.

Yours,

Conan

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