When you think of Sir Patrick Stewart, you think of a man who just recently found out that he wasn’t circumcised.
Sorry, that is how I think of him. You actually think of him as a dignified actor. Well, that is not always the case like in American Dad and Blunt Talk, but still. And soon we will see him in his sh!tiest role to date because he is playing 💩 in The Emoji Movie. I think the role should’ve gone to Seth Rogen because his voice sounds like that to me, but instead it went to a classy sounding British guy.
As we know he sounds classy, but he also has a wicked sense of humor to go with it. Yesterday, when he was on The Late Show, Stephen Colbert asked him about playing 💩. Here’s what the Sir told him, “I think she (The Queen of England) will approve because she will know, for me, poop, has been…a life long work in progress.” Then he explained why this role is method for him, “Totally internal until it is external…But you see, when I was an infant, of course, it was more spontaneous. But what is interesting in my teens, it took a kind of, umm, comedic spurt. It was low farce rather than high comedy. But as I matured, so did my output.”
With that answer, I cannot see anyone but him playing 💩. That is because that response was full of so much 💩, how can anyone else but him voice the role of a lifetime. It could easily be on his tombstone in 100 years from now, “Here lies a 💩”.
In case you couldn’t tell the 💩 is my favorite emoji. Therefore, I am happy one my favorite actors is playing him.
Last year, The Late Late Show’s James Corden hosted the Tony’s and Jimmy Kimmel Live’s Kimmel hosted the Emmys, this year The Tonight Show’s Jimmy Fallon hosted the Golden Globes, Corden is hosting the Grammys and Kimmel is hosting the Oscars. The only 11:30p late night host to not host a major awards show was Stephen Colbert. In fact, people were wondering if CBS was ever going to give him one. Well they finally did and it is the Emmys. Which makes you wonder if they really wanted him to do it or they are doing it so they can everyone they have faith in him.
I am thinking the latter. When CBS announced that he was going to take over for David Letterman, I was super excited to see what he was going to do with The Late Show. Then when he released viral videos leading up to the show, I thought he was going to be #1. Then his show debuted and I couldn’t even get through the first episode. He is so awful, I can’t even watch bits from his show on YouTube all the way through. They fall flat and his interviews are painful, so how is he going to host TV’s biggest night successfully?
Plus, does he know anything about television? CBS should’ve given it to Corden and said sorry Colbert we will find something else for you. Or maybe they should have given it to one of the people who is currently on their air like Michael Weatherly or Matthew Perry or Thomas Lennon or Will Arnett.
It is bad enough that the noms will probably be little watched shows with barely known celebrities, having him host the shindig is going to lead to disastrous ratings. Oh well, I guess they wanted to let the world that they still believe him. Even though most people don’t any more.
There have been plenty of horror movies about killer Santa Clauses throughout the decades, but none of them have been as horrifying as the Kris Kringle Liam Neeson created for The Late Show. So scary, it is the first time I am OK with being on his naughty list so he doesn’t come down my chimney on Sunday morning.
It has been over 20 years since REM released its the End of the World. Now they we are so close to it, Stephen Colbert decided to rework it for our disastrous year on The Late Show and asked Michael Stipe to join him. For some reason the bearded singer was not fine with it, but then he joined in on It’s the End of the Year.
I don’t know about you, but this version is replacing the old one on my iPod.
Paul McCartney’s song Wonderful Christmas was named the worst Christmas song ever. Stephen Colbert is not going to let that record stand, so he wrote one that he thinks is worse. Norah Jones and him debuted Christmas Is Now yesterday on The Late Show and my cat loves it. It is her favorite song of the holiday.
I don’t Macca’s song is the worst song of the season. I can’t think which one is worse, can you?
