Scary Movie 5 is out today and it is the best one of the franchise that spoofs the biggest horror movies of today.
The film starts off with a scene that none of you have been hearing about. Charlie Sheen and Lindsay Lohan are in bed together about to make Hollywood history in a Paranormal Activity spoof. Just when you don’t think it can get any funnier between the two of them, they take part in the most epic sex scene you have ever seen in a nonporn. It will totally blow your mind as you laugh out loud in hysterics!
Then you won’t need any of the pot that Snoop Lion aka Dogg has been smoking to giggle your way through him going to a remote cabin in a woods. What he discovers in there will set up the rest of the movie.
He finds three little kids, who have been fending for themselves out there alone in the woods, and they are about to be taken in by their uncle (Simon Rex) and his wife (Ashley Tisdale). The two girls and a boy have been guided by a spirit names Mama and she is evil. She will get them to bad things, but even though you can’t see her she can still cause havoc without their help.
So now Jody (Tisdale) and Dan (Rex) need to figure out a way to make her disappear. They will contact renowned paranormal investigator Blaine Fulda (Katt Williams) and he will do stuff that no medium has ever done before and steal the movie.
Even though their nights are ruined, Jody and Dan still have their day jobs. Dan is working with apes trying to make them more intelligent, but it isn’t going as planned in this take of Rise of the Planet of the Apes. Meanwhile Jody is getting back into ballet, something her mom (Heather Locklear) was doing up until the very second she had her. Jody is such an amazing dancer that she will be cast as the Black Swan and Heather Daltry (Molly Shannon) who previously had the part will not be happy with that turn of events. Shannon makes every scene she is in, so much so you can tell the actors can’t control themselves around her.
Kendra Brooks (Erica Ash) is Jody’s ballet buddy and the two will become more than that in the best visual sex scene since Naked Gun 2 1/2. Then once the two ladies become one, they will try to find the book that can help them get rid of Mama. They will go to another cabin in the woods where they will meet some missionaries, who staying at the same place as the spell book that is being kept in the basement there. Jody and Kendra will read the spell, but things will go horribly wrong for the 4 missionaries (Bow Wow, Sarah Hyland and Katrina Bowden) as though they are part of the Evil Dead remake. So awful for them it will have you in stitches.
Even though Jody and Kendra read the right spell, it still didn’t work. Now it is there last chance to free themselves of Mama, will they be able to do it? You will just have to go see it to find out. And also to more spoofs on what is currently popular like Fifty Shades of Grey and Inception to name a few.
Scary Movie 5 reminds me of the greatness that we got from the Airplane and Naked Gun movies. You will be laughing uncontrollably from the beginning until the end of movie and I can’t remember the last time a spoof made me laugh this hard. It is truly a laugh a minute riot of a flick and who doesn’t need a laugh like that. And you might want to wear some depends because you might be laughing so hard, you will pee in your pants.
Now when it comes to the acting, everyone nailed it. But the true star of the movie is Lidia Porto, who plays Maria the housekeeper to Jody and Dan. She owns every scene she is in and goes to the extreme to make us laugh. I can’t even describe some of the stuff she does, so you will just have to run out and the see the movie now to find out.
The second trailer is out for Scary Movie V and I actually wait to see the movie when it comes on April 12th. It looks so awful that it might be actually be funny.
The first full trailer is out for Scary Movie 5 and why do I feel they showed all the funny scenes in it? Oh past experience with the other Scary Movie films.
BTW I am sure Chuck Lorre will be there on April 19th to watch Charlie Sheen get tortured by the ghost over and over again?
Anna Faris is passing on her Scary Movie crown and Ashley Tisdale is the recipient of it. Dimension Films announced that the High School Musical star is set to take over the reign when production starts on the fifth installment for the franchise this summer. After watching her on Raising Hope, I actually think she can do it. If you have never seen that episode, you have to find it online because it is amazing and the Hellcat is hysterical in it.
