Seriously? OMG! WTF? » Putting a ring on ‘it’ sent a man to the ER!
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[ # ] Putting a ring on ‘it’ sent a man to the ER!
May 31st, 2014 under Sex Sent Me to the ER

Sex Sent Me to the ER has some important lessons tonight at 9p on TLC and you don’t want to miss them.
A man shows up to the ER with an obstruction down there and the doctor can’t believe what he sees when the patient lifts his gown. The guy’s royal jewels are swollen because he has a steel ring around them all that just won’t come off. So the doctor tells him they have to get the ring off of them ASAP or he will lose his most prized possessions. The doctor tries a ring cutter, but it doesn’t even leave a scratch. No matter what he tries, nothing seems to work. So there is one last thing he can try, but will it work? You just have to tune in to see what comes off first, the jewelry or his jewels.
Another couple has smashing sex that sends them to the ER. Well not the smashing way they wanted because in the heat of passion, he stands up, passes out and falls backwards on to a glass table. Is he OK and what caused him to pass out?
Finally the last couple learns something else you should not do while operating heavy machinery and that is have sex in it. The husband is a construction worker about to get off of work, when his wife shows up. Since everyone has left for the day, he invites her to come up into the backhoe so that they can have sex. His plan is working out great for them until she touches the wrong gear shift. A sudden thrust from the tractor, causes the heavy door to close on his wrist and his wife to smash her head against the window. As soon as she comes to, they rush to the hospital. How will they explain what happened, especially after someone from his Church winds up being his doctor.
So tonight’s most important lesson, is that if you are going to put a ring on it, make sure to only put it on the finger and not on the balls and stick. Although you’d think they would’ve already learned that lesson from my favorite Rescue Me episode Inches.


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