Toddlers & Tiaras has gone to Vegas and you know what that means, we get a female impersonator judging the competition. I don’t know why that doesn’t happen more often on the TLC show because if you think about the toddlers are basically Drag Queens. They put on dresses they would never ever wear in their daily lives. They wear more makeup than the average woman who is going out on a first date. Plus they strut around and put on a show for an audience. So basically these little girls are Drag Queens without one thing. So again I ask why doesn’t this happen all the time???
Whether you want to admit or not, you totally checked out Here Comes Honey Boo Boo last night on TLC and you are not alone. Not only did you and I watch it, but so did a little boy who wrote a song called “I Love Honey Boo Boo”. That song just became our new anthem!
BTW I hope TLC hooks them up because I can’t wait to see their love unfold on the network. You know cause I doubt she will be leaving our TV’s anytime soon.
via Monsters & Critics
Annie is the Guinness Book of Records with the World’s Largest Natural Breasts and TLC spoke with the woman whose bra size is 102ZZZ for Strange Sex. I don’t know about you ladies, but I feel flat compared to her and I am not small chested. I also fear for any man that motorboats her because they might be lost in her cleavage forever. And I bet a lot guys would be willing to die that way. Imagine what his tombstone would read, “Here lies Harold, he died very very very happy motorboating a woman with the 102ZZZ natural breasts. Loving son, brother and envied by every man in the World.”
Oh here is something for us ladies, Jonah has the World’s Largest Pen!s that is 9″ when soft and 13.5″ when hard. I have not been able to uncross my legs since I have watched the video from Strange Sex and especially after finding nude pictures of him online.
via Monsters and Critcs
TLC continues to amaze me with the type of shows that they consider topics I want to learn about. Now I admit I like the concept of Strange Sex, but for some reason I am not as grossed out about it when it is on Skinemax. But when it is on The Learning Channel and it is couple talking about how the guy gets turned on by breastfeeding from his wife, I want to ban all guys from the doing the same to a non-lactating me. I don’t know why this clip creeped me out so much, but it did. And because of it I am going to be doubling up on calcium pills cause I don’t know when I will want to drink milk again.
BTW my favorite part from that clip is when the uptight woman describes what a fetish is. Like duh.
TLC is giving Honey Boo Boo child her own show and I don’t know why I can’t wait to watch it. According to Us Weekly the 6 half hour episodes will begin airing in August.
Now to make myself feel better about watching this guilty pleasure, I have come up with a drinking game to get us through it. Instead of using alcohol, I say let’s use Go Go Juice which is a mixture of Mountain Dew and Red Bull. It is a sugar high like you have never experienced and believe me I almost had to go to rehab for my problems with sugar.
Now back to game:
Every time she says Honey Boo Boo Child, drink once.
Every time she shows her belly, drink twice.
Every time either she or mother mention or say anything about couponing, drink three times.
Every time she wins a pageant, drink the whole sugary mixture.
By the time TLC gets to the first commercial, you will be so drunk on Go Go Juice that you will be running faster than Superman and think you can fly higher. Fight that temptation because you can’t.
