It is Christmas in July because Comedy Central picked up South Park for 50 new episodes. But wait, it gets better. All 26 previous seasons will be available to stream on Paramount+ for the first time.
“Trey and I and the whole South Park crew are grateful for this extension and this deal. We want to thank Chris McCarthy and Keyes Hill-Edgar for years of great partnership and are looking forward to continuing to make South Park for the next five years,” said Matt Stone.
Added Trey Parker, “We are grateful for this opportunity and deeply honored by the trust placed in us. This is about more than a contract — it’s about our commitment to this organization, our teammates, and our fans. We’re focused on building something special and doing whatever it takes to bring championships to this city.”
Christmas came really early for Stone and Parker because their new five-year deal is worth $300 million per year for a total of $1.5 billion.
South Park was scheduled to air its first new episode in two years on July 9th, but Comedy Central announced today that it will now air on July 23rd.
The show’s creators, Trey Parker and Matt Stone, are not happy about it, to say the least. What they said was, “THIS MERGER IS A SHITSHOW AND IT’S FUCKING UP SOUTH PARK. WE ARE AT THE STUDIO WORKING ON NEW EPISODES AND WE HOPE THE FANS GET TO SEE THEM SOMEHOW.”
They are not wrong. Paramount should be kissing their asses and try to make them as happy as possible. The animated sitcom is their most popular show, and it makes a lot of money in syndication and streaming. That is, if Paramount could get them a new deal. Something that they are also not happy about.
I am not happy for them. I am also not happy that Paramount settled with Donald Trump for $16 million over Kamala Harris’ interview on 60 Minutes. By doing so, they are saying it is acceptable for the government to disregard the First Amendment and dictate what the news reports about them. It is a very dangerous decision they made for what I assume is a way of guaranteeing that they get this merger approved. I hope that everyone who approved this settlement will be fired as soon as the merger is completed. If it goes through.
South Park doesn’t shy away from controversy. In fact, Trey Parker and Matt Stone run towards it. For example, they have taken on the COVID-19 vaccine, streaming, Only Fans (I am still not over that), and Stanley Tumblers.
On May 24th, they are tackling Ozempic, the $ 1,000-a-month weight loss medicine. In SOUTH PARK: THE END OF OBESITY, the advent of new weight loss drugs has a huge impact on everyone in South Park. When Cartman is denied access to the life-changing medicine, the kids jump into action.
I can’t wait to see the skinny of their take because you know those fat cats will destroy all those people who are taking it when they don’t have to.
So I woke up this morning, and I got an email from Comedy Central telling me there was a new South Park movie to stream on Paramount+. Since I had nothing else to watch, I figured I would give it a try.
Let’s just say. It takes a lot to shock me, and South Park: Not Suitable For Children did just that.
The 45-minute special starts out with a teacher being busted for having an OnlyFans page. During the parent/teacher meeting about it, Randy finds out how much money she makes and decides to create his own OnlyFans account.
I have seen a lot of crude things in animation, but Randy’s dick and hairy balls is an image that will forever be etched in my mind. And we see it a lot.
Believe me, I have no problem with seeing a nude man. But when you see this, you will understand why I had to text my sexting buddies for dick pics. And it still didn’t help.
It isn’t only about Randy. It is also about the kids drinking the new sugary sports drink, Cred. They are all drinking it because an influencer told them to. But who is that influencer, and why are they doing it? That is what Randy and the kids are going to have to find out. And what happens when they do?
It might sound like I didn’t like this special. And that is wrong. I enjoyed it. Not because there were so many penises. Because I like to see the male anatomy on my television. But because they pushed so many buttons in such a short time. Just like they did in Trey Parker and Matt Stone’s first movie.
So, if you need a release this holiday season, then this is it.
Before you press play, pour some Brandy in the egg nog and drink every time you see Randy’s limp dick. You will be drunk before you know it.
For over 25 years, Cartman, Kenny, Stan, and Butters have looked the same. But they are getting a transformation on October 27th in South Park Joining The Panderverse on Paramount+.
Cartman’s deeply disturbing dreams portend the end of the life he knows and loves. The adults in South Park are also wrestling with their own life decisions as the advent of AI is turning their world upside down.
After watching that teaser, I have no idea what we are in for. And because of that I can’t wait to watch our favorite boys become girls.
