Seriously? OMG! WTF? » Nick Cannon
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Did Mario Lopez just diss Nick Cannon?
August 25th, 2022 under Mario Lopez, Nick Cannon. [ Comments: none ]

Yesterday, Nick Cannon announced that he is expecting his 10th child in 11 years, and almost all of us thought it. However, Mario Lopez said it. “Only thing certain in life is death, taxes & Nick Cannon knockin someone else up…”

Wow, Mr. Kiss Celebrites’ Asses was kicking Cannon in his with that joke. So you know it is bad when even the Access Hollywood host is making fun of you.

Someone needs to tame his snake and put it back into the basket. We need to ban all flute playing around him because, at this rate, he will have a baker’s dozen in a year from now. There aren’t enough jobs he can do to support all of them.

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Nick Cannon announces his 10th baby is on the way
August 24th, 2022 under Nick Cannon. [ Comments: none ]

 

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A post shared by NICK CANNON (@nickcannon)

Nick Cannon’s sperm continues to impregnate women because today, he announced that he is expecting his third child with Brittany Bell and his 10th baby overall.

Bell and Canon are already parents to 5-year-old son Golden and 1-year-old daughter Powerful Queen. Cannon also has 11-year-old twins, Roc, and Roe, with Mariah Carey. Abby de la Rosa is expecting his ninth child, and they are the parents of 1-year-old twins, Zion Mixolydian and Zillion Heir. Last month, he welcomed baby #8, Legendary, with Bre Tiesi. The actor also fathered Zen with Alyssa Scott, but sadly he died in December from brain cancer.

I am sorry, but he really needs a vasectomy. At a certain point, the 41-year-old has to say enough is enough. Because as his kids get older, they are going to need him more. And he will be unable to spread the time among them like he spreads his seed. There is more to being dad than making them.

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Nick Cannon welcomed baby #8
July 25th, 2022 under Nick Cannon. [ Comments: none ]

Brei Tesi/IInstagram

Are you like me and forget how many kids Nick Cannon has now? Well, the answer is 8 because he just welcomed his 8th child.

“I did it,” Brei Tesi, mother to his eighth child, wrote. “An all natural unmedicated home birth. This was the most humbling / limit pushing yet awakening and completely empowering experience. I can’t thank my team enough for delivering my son safely. This experience has changed me forever and I couldn’t of asked for a more amazing and supportive partner. Daddy showed the f up for us.. I couldn’t of done it without you. 💙 I can’t believe he’s here 🤗”

The proud papa responded with, “You never cease to amaze me!! Full of passion, drive, focus, brilliance and most importantly love!!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️ Honored and privileged to experience this beautiful miracle with you! Thank you for the greatest gift any human can give to another. For this my love is forever indebted.”

Cannon is also the father to 11-year-old twins Monroe and Moroccan with ex Mariah Carey. He shares 5-year-old Golden “Sagon” and 19-month-old Powerful Queen with Brittany Bell, and 13-month-old twins Zion Mixolydian and Zillion Heir with Abby De La Rosa. His son Zen, whom he shares with Alyssa Scott, died in December 2021 after being diagnosed with brain cancer. I stole this from People because who can keep track of all that besides them?

The comedian says he has more babies on the way. So the count will change.

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Is Nick Cannon engaged?
July 15th, 2022 under Nick Cannon. [ Comments: none ]

Nick Cannon has so many kids and baby mamas that it is hard to track them all.

But it looks like that is about to change because he posted the above photos and wrote, “I said I would never do it again but…Finally doing what the world wants me to do… 💍”

So is Cannon getting married again to this mysterious woman? Most likely not. It is probably for one of his many projects. Although, he has fewer projects than he does kids.

Plus, I don’t think his dick could handle being a one-woman penis.

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Ryan Reynolds gave Nick Cannon a vasectomy
June 8th, 2022 under Nick Cannon, Ryan Reynolds. [ Comments: 1 ]

If ever there was any man who needs a vasectomy, it is Nick Cannon. Especially since today, we found that he is expecting baby #9 and counting.

Therefore, Ryan Reynolds called up the 41-year-old and offered him a vasectomy. Just not the one he needs. Actually, it is quite the opposite because it is a drink made with Reynold’s Aviation American Gin.

If Cannon can’t put a condom on when he is sober, how is he going to do it when he has a cocktail or two.

So, we can blame Reynolds for babies #13 and #14 because the Vasectomy sounds delicious.

Oh, and when it comes to Reynolds wanting to drink now because he has three girls under 7. Wait until he has three teenage girls in the house. I am sure the Vasectomy will be too weak for him when that happens. He will just be drinking gin straight at that point, especially if they are all on the same cycle with his wife, Blake Lively!

One last note, can we all agree that Ryan Reynolds is the most brilliant man in advertising these days? He is the most significant advertising genius since Emory Leeson.

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