Yesterday, we got to see the Killer Kites’ trailer, and we couldn’t wait to see the film. So, they released it 23 days early, aka today, on Digital for all of us to enjoy like we did when we were flying a kite as a kid! Those days brought smiles to our faces, and so does this Horror movie.
Abby inherited a kite from her grandmother, and it has a dark secret she doesn’t know about. Unfortunately, she and everyone in her town is going to learn what it is. It has the power to kill people, and it enjoys doing so. Not only that, but it also gets other kites to do the same.
So now it is up to Abby and her friends to save the day. But how are they going to do it if the kites are indestructible? If a kite could survive lighting when Ben Franklin was flying it, then nothing could kill them.
How can Abby defeat the undefeatable? You have to see it to believe it.
And if they say seeing is believing, you are not going to believe a lot of what you see in this feature.
Something that makes a good Horredy is when they have fun with the absurd, mostly because they don’t have the money to do so. That is what makes them so special and enjoyable.
If you are going to do a movie about kites that kill, then you better make it as outrageous as possible. And that is what Paul Dale and Austin Frosch, the men behind Sewer Gators, did!
So what are you waiting for? The wind to blow your way so you can fly Killer Kites? No wind is required to laugh with this movie. All you need to do is download it. So go ahead and do it. You will love it as much as I do!
And did I mention that all of the best scenes are in the trailer? Now, I bet you want to see it even more!
Remember when we thought that Cocaine Bear was going to be the movie of the year? Well, that was too early of a prediction.
That is because today we learned the true movie of the year, and it is Killer Kites.
The title is self-explanatory. But in case it isn’t. Here is the description: When Abby’s grandma dies, the only thing she inherits is a stupid kite. After giving it to her brother; he is mysteriously killed, and the kite disappears. While searching for the truth, she is tangled in a strange supernatural plot where this killer kite continues to kill! Now, Abby must string together a way to stop the kite before it blows us all away. Kites may not be the scariest monster ever, but they’re up there.
It is not only that the movie is based on kites going around killing people; it is everything that they included in the trailer. The bad puns, the cheap special effects, the fact they have to position the kites to kill them, and so much more that they didn’t include.
I don’t know about you, but I can’t wait to see the film on digital on May 26th. However, releasing it during Memorial Day Weekend, the height of kiting season could cause nightmares throughout the United States. So now my plans for the holiday just went up, up, and away.
And I just have to say; I watch a lot of bad horror movies that are in on the joke, like this one. However, I still wonder how they come up with ideas like this. What happened to the creator with kites that they made came up with this concept?
UPDATE: Due to the demand to see this movie ASAP, after the buzz it got from the release of the trailer, they decided to release it on digital today. So watch it now, or anytime you want, because you know that once is not going to be enough.
Way before Cocaine Bear, there was Weedwolf. He is a werewolf who eats stoners because people on pot taste like fried chicken.
And what day do you want to watch a movie like that? April 20th, of course. So Kings of Horror will be streaming it on their YouTube channel that night.
So get some gummies, your bong, or a joint, and doobie with YouTubie!
As soon as the trailer for Cocaine Bear came out, I knew there would be copycats. The Asylum already announced that they are releasing Meth Gator.
And today, Dustin William Ferguson, released the trailer for his movie Cocaine Cougar. They just wrapped shooting yesterday, and we are already getting a trailer. Makes you wonder if the Cougar is the only one doing coke?
Cocaine Cougar is described as “a black cougar addicted to cocaine who escapes an animal testing facility and wreaks havoc on Los Angeles. Based on a true story.”
I don’t know about you, but I can’t wait to see this film because it looks like it is going to be highlarious.
And talking about Cocaine Bear. It is coming to Peacock on April 14th. When are we going to get Poppers Peacock?
Birdemic: Shock and Terror was a cult classic because it was so awful. As in, it was so bad that it was laughable. The script was horrendous. The special effects were so fake and cheap. And the acting was worse than an elementary school production. And even with all of that, it worked somehow.
The same could not be said about Birdemic 2, which was just unwatchable.
So I thought that would be the merciful ending to the franchise. And I was wrong because they made Birdemic 3: Sea Eagle. Which is described as, “From writer/director James Nguyen comes this new sequel to his BIRDEMIC: SHOCK AND TERROR, “the worst film ever made and a true cult hit” (The Guardian): When global warming triggers chaos along the Northern ”
Since I am a sucker, I have been sucked into wanting to see this movie. I am sure I will regret it. But we all make bad choices in life. And this will be another one of mine.
