Anyone who has seen a Sacha Baron Cohen movie knows there are going to have a lot of grotesque scenes. The grossest one has to be the elephant scene in The Brothers Grimsby.
Guess what? Isla Fisher told Conan O’Brien tonight that she actually took her father, her step-mom and her children there on that very day. She did not check the call sheet that morning, so she had no idea what they were doing. She saw elephants and thought it was safe and fun for the fam. Boy, was she wrong.
What did she do? She grabbed her family and said let’s go to lunch. Smart move. Marrying him, well that is a whole other discussion.
Today we are all Irish like Conan O’Brien, so celebrate St. Patrick’s Day like a Leprechaun at the end of the rainbow! Except for our pot of gold is a pint of Guinness!
Conan O’Brien and Timothy Olyphant are friends and friends go out to eat together. One night the two of them were out for dinner and a fan came over to them.
That fan found a way to compliment and insult both of them at the same. She looked at the Santa Clarita Diet star and said, “If I could have a guy…with your looks.” Then she moved her eyes over to the TBS host, “And your brains.”
Conan said when she left they both felt like sh!t. Although Olyphant’s response was better, he was like, “Thank you, you f*cking bitch.”
I have to say, sorry guys, I know I am going to compliment and insult both of you, but I agree.
Granted, the actor made me laugh when he came out dressed down like the host.
Nick Kroll’s animated show Big Mouth that is about teenagers going through puberty. Therefore, you might think he knows a lot about sex and is not a Caveman (does anyone get that reference) when it comes to the topic.
Conan O’Brien wanted to see just how much he knew, so they went to a high school in Burbank and taught sex ed to a bunch of students. How did they do? Conservatives would like to hire them to write a course on it because they make kids want to abstain from sex. At least that was the case for me.
Thankfully, the teens were smart enough to know that everything they were teaching them was wrong. To the boy who asked about flavor condoms. I like them because they make a guy taste good. Although, you have to taste them first to see if you like the flavor. My favorite is banana. What is yours? Oh and condoms are good, do not believe anyone who tells you otherwise.
I believe in abstinence-first until you are ready and not only. And use condoms! Can you tell I lectured people on safe sex for a while?
Jean-Claude Van Damme was on Conan yesterday, and O’Brien’s staff told the martial arts actor something about their boss before he went on the air. They revealed to him that O’Brien has a mental issue about his lack of a butt.
Before they started the interview, Van Damme brought that little tidbit up and said that Conan has a nice bum. That is when the TBS host stood up and let his guest feel his assets. Which he did, but Conan stayed a little too long.
Then when the show and feel was done, Van Damme gave us all tips on how to strengthen our tushes. Lie down on the ground, contract your butt cheeks for three seconds, release for two and repeat 30 times. If you do it properly, then you will not be able to walk the next day. Who cares about that because no one who is walking behind you will be able to look up at the back of your head. If you catch my drift and not my fart.
I can say that because you stopped reading after I told you the secret to having nice buttocks.
