Ah, the joys of attending a Rock Star: Supernova taping. If you’re
lucky enough to have an "in" at CBS, you can go to the front of the
line… and take a seat! Otherwise, be prepared to join the masses in
a lengthy game of hurry up and wait – outside- in the heat. Then
stand… and stand… and stand. I WOULD say that comfortable shoes
are a must, but that’s a lie. Because you need six-inch heels to see
over the heads of the camera-hungry nightclubbers that pack the pit.
It’s American-Bandstand-Dance Fever- Gone-Wild.
Anyway, the taping of what will become Tuesday night’s show was okay.
Not spectacular. There were a few good performances in there, but I
can guarantee you the producers and judges already know the top three
contenders (if not THE WINNER) for the Supernova gig. If they go with
a woman, Dilana has got to be the top choice. As for the guys, all I
remember is that a lot of them don’t have the stage presence to front
a rock band. "Mr. Iceland" Magni was better this week than last, and
if Iceland keeps voting, he’ll probably stick around a while
longer… but he won’t be the lead singer of Supernova. Neither will
Phil, Jill, Chris, Dana or Zayra. I can’t even remember who was who
among Josh, Toby and Ryan. I think they had good performances, but
obviously, no stand-outs. Lukas is just…. odd. And the whole
homeless-guy-turned-rockstar thing got old with J.D. (who, sources
say, was pretty much a shoe-in from the get-go last season despite
how it was ‘played’ for TV).
For those of you who were turned off by the judges being too darn
nice…. have no fear. They obviously got a talkin’ to from the man
himself, Mark Burnett (who was seen drifting around the set
throughout the evening). The judges pulled all sorts of non-sequitor
and conflicting criticisms out of their tattered pockets… but still
found time to incorporate those all-important rockstar critiques like
"you have a nice ass" and "the ladies love you, man". Oy.
It will definitely be interesting to see how the show is edited for
Tuesday because there were some bizarre and lengthy exchanges –
between the rockers and the judges, and between the judges
themselves. Jill talked back — at length, and very defensively–
when she was accused of trying to mimic Courtney Love. Dana tried to
pretend she was all grown up, singing "Born to Be Wild". Puh-leeze.
Just go home! You DO NOT want to be on a tour bus with these guys!!
Tommy Lee was in not-so-rare (i.e. totally out of it) form…
especially when he told fellow judge Jason to just "shut up" – and
then tried to kiss and make up. ICK.
The biggest problem is that NOBODY — not the judges and certainly
not the contestants seem to know what sound Supernova is going for.
At least with INXS, the rockers had a particular vibe to strive for
and the audience could really get a feel for who was "just not right
for our bahnd, INXS". Not so with Supernova.
Zayra admitted (in whatever accent that is of hers) that she was in
diapers when the judges were rockin’ out, so she wasn’t "all that
familiar" with their music (I suspect she doesn’t know a single
Metallica, Guns ‘N Roses or Motley Crue song). And she took the
judges to task (we’ll see if this makes the cut) for not clueing the
contestants in to what the heck the all-important "Supernova sound"
even is! She says the contestants therefore represent a "boo-
fay" (or as we say here in America, a "buffet" or smorgasboard) for
the judges to sample.
The best thing this show has going for it is the House Band. It
rocks. It puts the AI band to shame. Give those guys a contract…
and send Tommy Lee home.
Thanks Hannah!
