A new study out of Switzerland says that dogs manipulate their owners to get what they want. Conan O’Brien, who owns a dog, didn’t believe that his canine made him her bitch.
Then the TBS host uncovered a shocking video that shows that they truly are the masters and not the other way around.
How do I feel about this discovery? I am so glad I have cat. I know she might eat me one day, but at least I am the head bitch in charge. Or that is what I keep telling myself. Oh crap, she just read what I wrote. Send help!
Carl Reiner was on Conan the other night and he told him a story about his friend George Burns to Conan O’Brien.
Back in the late ’70s when the two men were working on the movie Oh Gd together, Reiner asked the legend a question about sex. You see at the time, Burns was a ladies man even though he was 80 years young. Because of that Reiner, who was 55 at that time, wanted to know what sex would be like when he gets to be his age. Burns told his friend, “Carl, You ever try to put an oyster in a slot machine?” With that I will end this post because that image is forever engraved into your mind. I know I cannot stop seeing it, and I am not talking about the oyster and the slot machine.
Jesse Tyler Ferguson was on Conan yesterday and he told the TBS late night host that he learned something new about his television father recently.
Ed O’Neill and him were filming a sauna scene on Modern Family and the actor was to appear nude in it but he was wearing nude underwear to cover up his privates from the crew. When Mitchell looked over at his dad, he noticed that he had a “distracting large” penis. He didn’t want to stare, so he looked away.
Then O’Neill started to become very fidgety and readjusting himself, so Ferguson thought his castmate had an erection. That was when the red head tried to defend his TV pop and took one more quick glance. That was when he realized O’Neill stuffed his underwear with a fake dong to play a prank on his TV son.
O’Neill was so proud of himself for pulling off the prank, he could not control his excitement. Not only because he got Ferguson good, but also because he came up with the joke all by himself. Which was a really good one! And I bet he looked so awwwwwdorable when his plan went up, I mean off, without a hitch.
Now imagine what would’ve happened if O’Neill did that with his TV wife Sofia Vergara? She probably would have laughed, then reached in and grabbed the dildo like it was nothing.
I also wonder if they kept the newest member of the cast around, named it and used it to prank other people on the show. I can totally see Eric Stonestreet walking up to people and tapping them on the shoulder with it. Couldn’t you?
Back when 45 declared that Mexico was going to pay for the wall between them and the US and they said they weren’t, things seemed strained between the neighboring countries. Conan O’Brien decided to take matters into his own hand to mend relations between us and them by taking his TBS talk show down to Mexico City. Tonight at 10p, we see what happens in Conan Without Borders: Made in Mexico.
The show opens up with him going to the Border Fence and trying to get into the country. They were obviously smart and didn’t want to let him in. He sneaks past them and now it is time for him to entertain the Mexican studio audience with some jokes in Spanish. He didn’t want them to get lost in translation like it does here in America. Sorry, Conan I had to. They laughed as hard as you will.
Anyways, next he shows them what happens when he asks people on the streets of Mexico if they will pay for the wall. Their answers are what you would expect, no but with explanations why. They love America and don’t want the divide that a small minority of Americans want.
In fact, this sentiment will be heard loud and clear when Rogue One’s Diego Luna talks to Conan about that topic and so much more during their interview. We will also see Conan join a Mexican telenovela, dance and play with a street band, learn how wrestle with the Lucha Libre and interview former Mexican President Vicente Fox.
He actually did a whole lot more like go to a Quinceañera, but there was only so much he could fit into the one hour special. A special that will be special to both sides of the border. One that needs to be watched by all, so we can tell 45, “Mr President, Don’t build that wall!”
Boys will boys and sometimes men will always be boys. Case in point yesterday on Conan, the TBS late night host asked his guest Adam Scott if a rumor he heard about him was true. That rumor is that two of his Parks & Recs co-stars, Chris Pratt and Nick Offerman, and him text each other pictures of their 💩 in the toilet. Scott told him they actually do that.
It is not just pictures of I ate a big meal and took a big dump. It is even more lame than that. Like Offerman sent a bowl full and said, “Happy Presidents’ Day.” Scott said that he thinks the last one he texted was something about the Oscar noms.