Riverdale has been on The CW for less than a month and it already got a pornody over at Pornhub called Beaverdale. Even though they won’t tell us the plot of the XXX movie, they did say in the press release that Archie, Betty and Veronica will finally get that three-way we have always wanted since we learned what they are.
Poor Jughead. Hopefully, he will get something too (Especially, since he is really cute here). Although, considering the people behind the movie, I am sure he does. Hopefully, we will find out why Archies comics called Josie’s bandmate’s The Pussycats.
Oh and this gives an all new meaning to the Archies’ song, Sugar, Sugar because you know Riverdale High is finally getting some!
Beaverdale is available now on Phub, along with WoodRocket’s first pornody feature Full Holes. Can you get what show that is about?
If you are a female Adult Entertainer, then you most likely have had something that is not a body part up your vajayjay. Pornhub wanted to know from a some of the biggest names in the business what that something is.
Alix Lynx asked that very question at the AVN Awards and got some very interesting answers to the say the least. It started out with a woman revealing she had a speculum followed by honey, peanut butter and bananas up there. Hopefully that was for oral sex. Other items included carrots, zucchini, a makeup sponge (for closeups I assume), hair straighteners and a curling iron. What was the most popular item? Three women said it was a cucumber, of course! But it wasn’t only about the pussy, a woman put a cat toy up her butt.
My favorite answer was Pop Rocks, to which Lynx said she used that once when she gave a blow job. I so want to try that on a guy, any takers?
And finally, they saved the best for last. Kissa might a get a ticket straight into heaven because hers is a crucifix.
And with that the mic is dropped. On that note, how come no one used a microphone.
Did you know there are people who are P0rn Historians? I didn’t either until Conan O’Brien had Brian Watson on his show yesterday. If you are going to talk about the history of p0rn, then you are going to have show and tell the first one. Right?
That is what he did when he talked about the 1908 French film At the Golden Inn. A maid uses a vacuum and learns she can use it to clean the rug below her feet and the one between her legs. Definitely a lot different than what we are used to seeing today.
Did you know the Victorian era ushered in fetish p0rnography? That a man loves rubber duckies so much, he had a p0rn0 made for him with them. And finally not only did Caveman invent the first profession, they also drew vajayjays on their caves. So prostitution and p0rnography have been around since we have been. And yet we have a huge problem with sex! Seems like it would be innate by now?
If you want to see A L’Ecu d’Or ou la Bonne Auberge, then you can do so on here. I take back what I said, it looks a lot like what we have today. Nice to see it hasn’t changed in 108 years.
A few weeks ago, PornHub.com introduced Described Video on their site. Basically, they narrate p0rn for the visually impaired so they can experience it too.
Well, Jimmy Kimmel Live liked the idea so much that they asked people on Hollywood Boulevard to narrate a pornographic scene. How did it go? It won’t get anyone who listens to it scream in excitement, but it will make them laugh out loud. You will be yelling out, yes, yes, yes and oh Gd, but not in the way they intended.
BTW does anyone know how to get a job narrating p0rn! I seriously want to do that.
You know that sweet and innocent caped crusader who flew from CBS over to The CW? Well she isn’t as sweet and innocent in Axel Braun’s pornody Supergirl XXX.
Now we will finally find out which sex is better to have sex with if they are superhero. I would think the man, because Superman is faster than a speeding bullet and there is no way any huMan can satisfy Supergirl. If you think satisfying a huWOman is tough, imagine trying to do that to a female who has unlimited stamina. You will get lockjaw and still she won’t be satisfied even after hours of Viagra.
That’s my opinion is, what’s yours? Don’t have one, then you can buy Supergirl XXX when it comes out and see for yourself as she takes on Brainiac. Personally, I would’ve thought the villain would be called Aphrodisiac.