Jimmy Kimmel’s wife is 28 weeks pregnant and turns out the ABC late night host might not be the father.
We know that Matt Damon was f*cking Sarah Silverman when she was dating Kimmel, and now it turns out that the actor is doing the same thing to his wife Molly. That means he could be the baby daddy. Is he? There is only way to solve this problem and that is to ask Maury Povich, who’s the father?
Is it Matt Damon or Jimmy Kimmel? They are not the father. Why? As Molly said, “How can either of you satisfy me when all you really want is each other?” Even Ben Affleck knew that because it really is obvious. What wasn’t obvious is who really is the father. Someone I would let put a baby in my belly. Wouldn’t you?
Almost every night since Jimmy Kimmel Live started, the late night host apologizes to Matt Damon because he ran out of time and can’t have him on the show that night or any night. For the last 13 years, we have wondered if Jason Bourne is really there waiting to go on. Last night we got that answer and it is yes.
When Idina Menzel nervously told the Kimmel that she has a crush on his arch nemesis and feared that he hated her in Wicked, the ABC talk show went live from his dressing room, where he has been housed for over a decade, to get the facts straight. Just as Damon was giving his side of the story, Kimmel informed him they ran out of time.
Maybe tomorrow, we will learn more. That is unless they run out of time for him yet again.
James Corden thinks that he looks a lot like Matt Damon, so Matt Damon offered him a role in Jason Bourne. What was that part? The Late Late Show host is his stunt double.
The first scene was a fight one and he was left with a black eye. The next one was a little tougher, when the CBS host had to jump off of a building into a dumpster. He was not successful in his dumpster dive because he missed it. Therefore, he suffered a shattered elbow, a sprained his neck and a dislocated penis. If that was not enough insult to injury, his last stunt was a career ender. But sadly it was not enough to get Matt Damon out of being a guest on the CBS talk show.
Will we get to see Corden in the movie? Sadly, his scenes were left on the cutting room floor, right next to last place where James still had a functioning penis!
Matt Damon was hanging out at The Grove and he decided to prank some shoppers for a good cause. Together with Omaze, they had someone drop a phone in front of an unsuspecting people as it rang. When they picked it up, he gave them different instructions. But they all wound up getting an envelope from a strange man that lead them to Matt Damon. Damon had a surprise for them when they came face to face, tickets to the premiere of the latest Jason Bourne movie.
What made this prank so awesome, is their reactions. Like when he told a guy to buy a hot dog, and the guy is like they cost $14. I would’ve hung up if someone asked me to blow that much money on a wiener.
Why did he do all of this? To bring awareness to his Omaze contest which is raising money for his charity Water.Org. The winner will get to hang with him at the premiere in Vegas later this summer. That’s a win/win.
Earlier this week, the new trailer for Jason Bourne came out. Yesterday, Jimmy Kimmel reworked to make it more to his liking. The action movie is now about comedy about called Bourne Loser. I don’t know about you, but I prefer the Jimmy Kimmel Live version!